The Syntax quiz

If it was not for this quiz's result, I would have skipped Morpho & Syntax tutorial. And I was already prepared to be emo, to expect the worst, but to my complete surprise, and also my horror, because after I saw my marks, I almost had a moment of break down.

I know... I'm being very emo. Because I really was expecting the worst. I told myself again and again before that, that if my quiz marks came back super lousy, I will not cry or show to anyone how much my stupid marks are affecting me. Why do I say so? Because this sem has not been good to me. Okay, technically last sem was bad too, seeing as my CGPA dropped so much that I don't think my dad will be pleased if he knows.

I still didn't tell him my result yet.

So anyways.... this sem's quizzes have all been bad for me. It's not that I didn't put in effort. In fact, for my Psycholing quizzes and Morpho quiz I studied bermati-matian for them. Not so bermati-matian that I am almost dead, but close enough. It's safe to say that I put in quite a lot of effort for the studying, well, more than I usually did for quizzes and tests, and what do I get?

Stupid, sucky results, is what. Again and again my results came back, and I had to tell myself to not cry over my result because, honestly, it's not that bad. It really is NOT that bad, it's just not good. Doesn't make sense? All this while my parents expect me to get good results. They don't expect average result, they want above average result. And out of sheer luck, I have always managed to give them that. I guess my luck is running out already, seeing as my results are all so very average, and that are only during good days. I don't even want to mention the bad days.

Anyways, this Syntax quiz is not that great anyways. It's not like I got 90% or something, but the thing is, I didn't put in much effort for this quiz at all. In fact, I looked over the notes once and decided that I might as well not bother since all my extra efforts for Pyscholing and Morpho quizzes all went down the drain, got flushed by the heavy rain all the way into the polluted sea and was never to be seen again. I figured it will happen again to me for Syntax quiz, and so if I didn't put in any effort, at least I could tell myself that it serves me right. At least I won't be so depressed about my efforts being wasted and me feeling like a complete stupid.

Except that this wasn't what had happened. My quiz turned out better than I expected, even if it's not great, but still....

Makes me wonder if I shouldn't bother at all for my quizzes and tests. It seems that it works better when I don't care.